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Dads & Family Dynamics: Why Support for the Whole Family Matters

How Family Therapy and Wellness Shape the Postpartum Experience

Co-authored by Dr. Carey, Clinical Psychologist & Certified Gottman Method Couples Therapist

In the early months of parenthood, the spotlight often lands squarely on the mom and baby—and for good reason. But what about dad? What about the entire family unit?

At New Mom School, we believe that whole-family wellness is essential—not just for the health of the mother, but for the strength of every relationship surrounding her. That’s why we’re talking about dads, co-parents, and family dynamics—and how therapy, communication, and emotional support can create a healthier, happier foundation for everyone.

The Quiet Struggle of New Dads

While moms are often encouraged to seek postpartum support from family, friends, and the community, dads can be left, dads can be left on the sidelines—expected to “man up,” keep it together, or stay in problem-solving mode. But becoming a father is a profound identity shift.

  • 1 in 10 dads experience postpartum depression (AAP)
  • Many feel disconnected or unsure of how to help
  • Others feel invisible as the focus shifts to baby and mom

What dads need isn’t just a few diaper tips. They need to be seen, heard, and supported as equal parts of the parenting equation.

Why Family Therapy Isn’t Just for “Big Problems”

The word “therapy” can sound heavy—but at its core, family therapy is about helping relationships function better. In the postpartum period, it can be a powerful tool for:

  • Improving communication between partners
  • Navigating new roles and responsibilities
  • Rebuilding intimacy (emotional and physical)
  • Processing unexpected feelings like resentment, anxiety, or grief
  • Creating healthy boundaries with extended family

You don’t have to wait until things feel broken. Therapy can be preventative, proactive, and even transformative.

When Family Dynamics Get Complicated

Every family is different—and so is every postpartum journey. Some families are navigating blended dynamics, co-parenting after separation, grief, or cultural pressures that complicate expectations around parenting roles.

Here’s what we want you to know:

  • You’re not doing it wrong if your family doesn’t look “traditional”
  • You’re not failing if you need outside help
  • You’re not alone if the early days of parenthood feel more chaotic than joyful

Whether you’re parenting with a partner, alongside a grandparent, or solo with support, your family deserves care and intentionality.

How New Mom School Supports Dads & Family Wellness

While our classes are designed to support moms, we never forget the bigger picture. Here’s how we include and uplift family dynamics:

  • Visiting Experts who offer tools for partner communication, relationship health, and co-parenting strategies
  • Mental Health Sessions covering maternal AND partner wellness
  • Homework & Conversations that involve both parents and normalize asking for help
  • Community Support that recognizes the emotional labor both parents carry

When a mom feels supported by her partner, her mental health improves. When a dad feels confident and connected, his engagement deepens. When both are thriving, so is the baby.

Real Talk from the Experts
Suggestions from Dr. Carey, Clinical Psychologist and Certified Gottman Method Couples Therapist:

Bringing home a new baby is exciting, scary, and changes everything. Adjusting to a new baby is a challenge, but it can also bring a sense of personal growth and increased life satisfaction to your family as well. Here are some tips to help you and your new family survive… and thrive: 

  • Often both parents are sleep deprived and exhausted when a new baby arrives home, so affection and intimacy may dramatically decrease. This often leaves Dad feeling left out and alone. Find ways to incorporate affection in small moments throughout the week to feel more connected. For instance, try a 30-second hug or a 6-second kiss. 
  • New babies can disrupt normal schedules and leave little down time for parents. Try setting up daily free time for each of you; this may be as little as 30 minutes each when the other parent or a helper is in charge of childcare. That 30 minutes can be used to answer email, watch funny videos, lie down and take a quick nap, shower, or whatever feels good. 
  • When tensions are high and there are a lot of new priorities, routines, and tasks, resentments can arise. It is important for families to prioritize open and honest communication about needs and any emerging frustrations. Try sitting down for a few moments each day and telling your partner one specific small thing you would like from them (e.g., bring me some tea in the morning, give me a compliment, etc.). See if you two can find a way to make those things happen. 
  • With a lot going on in the household, it is also easy to focus on what is not getting done (or done “right”) instead of what you appreciate. Try setting up a dry erase board or pinning a piece of paper on the wall. Every day, write down one thing you appreciate about your partner, family, others who are helping out around the house, and/or yourself.

Mental Wellness Is Family Wellness

Supporting the family system doesn’t just benefit parents—it creates a more stable, emotionally secure environment for the baby, too. Studies show that babies thrive when:

  • Both parents feel emotionally supported 
  • Household tension is reduced 
  • There is consistency in caregiving and boundaries 

Investing in your family dynamic is one of the most impactful things you can do for your child’s emotional development.

💛 You Don’t Have to Navigate It Alone

Whether you’re feeling like you’re drifting from your partner, frustrated by extended family involvement, or just needing guidance on how to work better together—there’s support for that. And it starts with conversation.

Join us at New Mom School. Our classes don’t just support moms—they uplift the entire family system. Because you weren’t meant to figure this out on your own.

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Additional Resources

Looking for more support as you navigate parenthood together? Explore these expert-backed tools from The Gottman Institute:

📱 App: Gottman Card Decks App
Free and full of helpful prompts—including a “Bringing Baby Home” section for new parents (scroll to the bottom of the homepage for access!)